The Simple Joys of a Plastic Bowl

A lot has changed in my household over the last few months. First, I became guardian to my 10 year old tutoring student (JJ), then foster mom to his one year old brother (IK). Then, we moved to a larger apartment to accommodate us all. And, my own child shed their birth name -- an association with an abusive father that they no longer wished to have -- and chose a new name (EB). Meanwhile, the pandemic is still raging globally and most of us are still spending huge amounts of time at home. 

The one year old has been with us for almost four months now, and it's been a delight to see him grow and change. 

As anyone who has raised children can attest, sometimes the best toys are the simplest, and that's certainly true with IK! A few months ago, most toys and objects bewildered him, but as time has gone on, he's progressed and gained skills and improved motor function. And, he's definitely developed favorites among his toys -- one of which is a simple, plastic bowl. 

We live in a world that saturates children's lives with technology practically from birth, not just in the gadgets and gear new parents are told they need, but in the toys promoted to parents and children: toys that beep and chirp and talk. Toys that ask kids to push buttons and make associations before their young brains are developmentally ready. Toys that whir and buzz and honk. Toys that drive parents mad with sound in an already noisy world.

So, when IK decided that a simple, yellow, plastic bowl from IKEA was his favorite toy, I was delighted! 

A plastic bowl is a great way for a child to learn about the world around them. They can:

• Put things in and take them out
• Hide things under an upside down bowl and then discover them again  
• Wear the bowl as a hat
• Put their feet or hands (or both) in and take them out
• Turn the bowl over and stack things on top (or try to stack things inside the bowl)
• Bang on the bowl like it's a drum or use the bowl to bang on other things
• Pick it up and drop it 
• Chew on it
  
• If they are walking, put things in the bowl and use it to carry objects.

And, there are probably many, many more ways a baby or toddler can use a bowl that I'm not even thinking of -- leave a comment and let me know how your kids have used bowls for play and exploration! 

This simple toy is also a great reminder for me to slow down my life, rely less on technology, and to find simpler ways of experiencing the world. Instead of spending an hour scrolling on social media or zoned out in front of TV, I could stretch and do some yoga, take a walk with EB, work on my container garden (our new apartment -- really, a townhouse -- has a HUGE patio), or simply get down on all fours and play with IK or get outside and kick a soccer ball with JJ. 

A Mom2MomEd Story: The day my son cut his own hair

For the record, the child pictured above is not my son...read onward...

If you are a parent, you have undoubtedly had that moment of realizing that the house is suddenly just a little too quiet for comfort.

Maybe the kids have discovered how absorbent toilet paper is and decided to experiment by stuffing as much of it in the toilet as possible and then flushing. Maybe they discovered a permanent marker and decided a few tattoos on themselves and on the nearest wall were in order.

Or...as happened with my son...your child found some scissors and decided to perform his or her own haircut. 

Let's face it -- if you are a parent, you've probably been there, done that with at least one child. Am I right???

So, let me tell you a story about the day my darling little boy (he's 21 now!) decided to trim his own hair.

When my son was born, we were extremely broke -- like one wrong thing and we'd be homeless if it weren't for the help of my parents level broke. As a result, I taught myself to do as many tasks as I could myself, including cutting our hair myself. As he grew older and more mobile, I became careful about putting scissors away as soon as I was done cutting his hair. 

Shortly after my son's third birthday, I trimmed his golden locks, preparing him to be the ring bearer in my sister's upcoming wedding. He was going to be so cute in his tiny tuxedo, Jerry Maguire glasses (remember that kid?), and golden curls! He was excited and so was I!

Fast forward an hour or so after the haircut and my realizing I hadn't heard a noise from my little guy in a while... Curious, I looked around the living room and didn't see him -- I'd left him playing with his Duplo blocks while I did some cooking and cleaning in the adjacent kitchen. But, the sliding glass door was open a crack (thankfully our yard was small and secure!).

I found my child on the patio, scissors in one hand, and a clump of hair in the other!

And, a big ol' bald spot smack in the middle of his hair at the top of his forehead. 

My child had not only cut off a big chunk of his own hair, but he'd done so in an area that would not only be impossible to hide with the rest of his hair due to the location, but it also was quite a large patch! And, he'd cut the hair so close to the skin that it looked like he'd stopped just short of scalping himself!

I didn't know if I should laugh or cry and I probably did a little of both. 

I ended up trimming his hair as much as I could. but because he'd cut so much and so closely to the skin, I didn't do a great job -- I didn't have the tools to deal with that effectively. So, his sweet, thick, soft, golden hair was gone. No more adorable curls framing his face. No more sweet bangs flopping down over his forehead. 

By the time we flew to California for my sister's wedding and the preceding wedding party events, my son's hair had not had time to grow back. So, my future brother-in-law took my little boy to a friend's barbershop and they returned to my sister's house with a well done haircut that looked...

Good...?

The new haircut was indeed well done and obviously the work of a professional barber, but my son's hair was so lightly golden and the haircut necessarily so close to the head due to the near scalping nature of my son's DIY attempt that my child looked bald.

Truly, if you weren't right next to him, you couldn't actually see his hair! 

Imagine if you will, a three year old of usually serious nature, large round glasses, button down shirts (his favorite at the time), and hair so light that he looked bald from a distance. Oh, and did I mention that his head was, um, large?

Now, imagine the same little boy in a tuxedo. His head looked even larger.

My son did a great job as the ring bearer at my sister's wedding, but throughout the reception, I continually had people coming up to me and asking questions like, "What kind does he have?" or "How is he handling treatment?" It took a minute for me to realize they thought he was bald due to chemotherapy and cancer!

YIKES!

But, my son made up for the seriousness of such questions by being a little bit of a comedian at the reception, climbing under the bridal party's table on the stage and sticking his head out from under the floor length table cloths and looking around -- his head looked disembodied and he was so stoic in his expression that the effect was hilarious! People noticed and he became even more serious and funny at the same time!

I wish I had pictures of my son's first (and only, thankfully) do-it-yourself haircut and the events that followed.I probably had at least a moment of being mad, but in hindsight, I'm so glad my son and I shared this experience! Photos would have been precious keepsakes, but I do have my memories. 

Tell us a story about your own kids giving themselves haircuts! What did they do and how did you handle it? 

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Three tips to ease potty training

My son and I went through potty training about 15 years ago--he's 18 now and, thankfully, we practically sailed through potty training during the toddler years. I know not everyone is so lucky. Several of my friends have young kids and are going through the potty training journey now with varying levels of success and frustrations.

While there are no guaranteed methods to potty train your child with ease, here are three steps I took with my son and why I think they worked so well:

1. Keep the door open
This seems to be a little bit of a controversial suggestion, especially if your child is the opposite gender of yourself, but if it's not a hassle, why not keep the bathroom door open?

I think one of the big reasons that kids are afraid to use the toilet or have difficulty with potty training is simply that the bathroom is mysterious. They know there's a toilet, and maybe they have some idea of what the toilet is for, but without seeing anyone use it, the toilet is this mysterious thing--it's this bowl, filled with water, with a huge hole. It makes complete sense to me why a child might be afraid of the toilet! If you had to sit on a bowl with an opening significantly larger than your backside, wouldn't you be afraid of falling in???

I struggled with toilet training my son until I didn't get the door shut all the way one morning when I had to use the bathroom. My son followed me to the bathroom and pushed the door open and suddenly the mystery around using the toilet was gone. After a few more times of seeing me use the toilet, it became much easier to convince him to sit on the seat--of course, we did get a little seat that fit on top of the regular toilet so that he wouldn't fall in! (THIS seat is very similar to what we used.)

You can buy little potty chairs, but I honestly think you can skip that unless you are traveling a lot and think your little one can't make it between pit stops.

2. Make it fun
There are a variety of ways to make potty training fun. My son didn't really need stickers or treats or other little trinkets when it came to potty training, but due to some ongoing gastrointestinal issues, he did need a way to pass time on the toilet without focusing on the actual task of going potty.

I kept a basket in the bathroom filled with some of my son's favorite books and periodically slipped in a couple of new books as well. We read books related to using the toilet, as well as many other little books that were simply enjoyable to read together.

We also spent a lot of time singing silly children's songs while he sat on the toilet waiting for the potty action to happen.

Then, once he'd peed or pooped we both clapped and I would give him a hearty "Good job, buddy!" and we'd do a high five. If you can get your child onto the toilet, it doesn't take much to make it a happy, fun experience (as fun as going to the bathroom can be, anyway!).

3. Stick to a schedule
You don't need to be super strict in keeping your child to a potty schedule, like drilling down to the minute or even to the five or ten minute marks; however, your child will benefit from a loose potty schedule. You'll need to gauge where your child is in their potty training and how long they reasonably can go between potty breaks to determine the schedule.

With my son, we started out by going to the potty first thing in the morning, trying for the same time every morning. Then, we would make a trip to the toilet every two hours throughout the day. Over time, we were able to stretch to three, then four hours between bathroom trips. Of course, we weren't always successful and sometimes we were out doing errands and a bathroom wasn't readily available or the only available bathroom was too gross for us to even consider.

As I mentioned, there are no guarantees that any particular method will work for your child. You may have to do some trial and error to find what works best for your family, but above all, pay attention to the clues your child is giving you. You may find that other tips and tricks work best for your family. Ultimately, do what works for your child's temperament and your situation.

Of course, I am not a medical doctor or other medical professional, so if you have any concerns about toilet training or other issues with your child, be sure to consult a pediatrician or other appropriate professional. The tips I provided here are only my opinion and are not to be taken as medical advice.

Are you a seasoned parent that has already gone through potty training with your children? What great tips or ideas do you have to share?

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