My skincare -- how I look significantly younger than my age

As a teenager, I thought I had terrible skin. 

 

Like many teens, I had my share of acne and suffered from different types across different areas of my face and upper back. I had some pretty straightforward whiteheads and blackheads, but also suffered from painful cystic acne. 

 

I thought my skin was disgusting and it didn't help that my parents and one grandmother would regularly tell me to wash my face, use this or that product, pop a zit, etc. At one point, my mom took me to our family doctor and I was prescribed medication that actually didn't do anything. Despite visible evidence by looking at my skin compared to my peers' skin, I developed a complex about it and thought my skin was gross and that I was ugly.

Looking back on my teen years, I know now -- 30+ years later -- that my skin actually was pretty good compared to that of many of my peers! In high school, I never heard another teen call me names or tease me for my skin, but I know some kids with worse skin did face this kind of peer criticism. I wish I knew then what I know about my skin: despite my regular breakouts, it actually wasn't bad. What I dealt with was mild compared to some of my peers.

And...

A lot of my skin issues were likely the result from OVER washing, using regular bar soap on my face, and over use of various skincare products. 

All of that said, one of my other grandmother's is probably partially why my skin wasn't worse. She regularly encouraged me to drink water instead of soda or juice, to use sunscreen, and to moisturize with a high quality lotion. I have always had a tendency towards sunburns, so I took her seriously regarding sunscreen and rarely left the house without covering my face and ears in the stuff.

Admittedly, genetics have likely had a place in my skin health over the course of my lifetime -- I'm not naive enough to think my skincare routines have been the be all, end all of my skin health. However, I have noticed some patterns over the years with how my skin behaves under different conditions and with different products. 

Between my skincare routine, diet, exercise, genetics, and so on, I've kept my skin pretty darn healthy over the years, to a degree that I regularly receive compliments on my skin and disbelief when people find out I'm nearly 50 years old. For the past three decades, people have assumed I'm anywhere from five to 15 years younger than my actual age -- at this point, I do have some graying hair around my temples and that is starting to give away my age (but my kid said it's graying "in a really cool way" so the gray is here to stay!). Despite graying hair, I'm regularly mistaken for being my adult child's sibling or girlfriend rather than their mom!

I get asked about my skincare pretty regularly, so here's what I do with three major caveats first:

 

1. I am NOT a doctor or healthcare provider. This is NOT meant as advice and is only what has worked for me. You should speak to your healthcare provider if you have concerns about the health of your skin (and make sure you get a skin cancer check of any moles or abnormalities!).

2. I am nearly 50 and this is what I do NOW. My skincare needs have changed over the decades. What works for 50 year old skin isn't going to work for 15 year old skin!

 

3. I'm not going to share pictures of my skin. There are too many trolls who will decide my mostly clear skin is disgusting regardless of any proof that it's not. There are trolls that relish in being nasty and I want no part in that. I'm sure I'll get some accusations that I'm lying and am actually disgusting because I'm not sharing pictures, but those are not my people. One part of my self-care is to mitigate opportunities for people to bash on me -- NOT sharing photos is one way I'm doing that. 

At its most basic, my skincare routine consists of:

• Less makeup
• More moisturizer
• More sun protection (sunscreen, hats)
• Drink more water
• Eat more fresh food (especially produce)
• Never use soap on the face -- only face specific cleansers
• Don't neglect the rest of the body -- neck, chest, back of hands
• Avoid over washing
• Never go to bed with makeup on 
• Rinse with plain water rather than washing a couple of times per day
  

Although my skin was never really terrible, I radically changed my skincare routine and made lifestyle changes about 15 years ago, and my skin is the healthiest it's ever been.

 

It took probably three years for prior damage to really be repaired, so it does take patience.You won't see results right away from changing your skincare routine.

 

My typical routine consists of:

 

MORNING:

-- Wash hands and rinse face with plain water

-- Apply either Aveeno lotion or The Body Shop Vitamin E moisturizer to face/neck/chest/back of hands; apply Aveeno to arms and elbows

-- If going outside for more than 30 minutes, particularly on sunny or snowy days, apply either Neutrogena SPF 55 sunscreen or The Body Shop Vitamin E sunscreen or Badger sunscreen with special focus on face, chest, backs of hands, ears

-- Drink water before coffee/tea

 

THROUGHOUT THE DAY:

-- Drink water (I try to remember to fill three 20-30oz water bottles in the morning) -- I do drink more coffee than I should, but when I'm not drinking coffee, I'm usually drinking water.

-- Eat a lot of fresh produce with a focus on veggies (if you don't already do this, it will take time to develop a taste for them).

........I make it a habit to eat more than 30 types of veggies, fruits, nuts, and seeds per week.

-- If I feel icky/sweaty/dirty: rise my face with plain water unless I'm visibly dirty or have worked out and gotten sweaty.

 

EVENING/BEFORE BED

-- Clean off any makeup with makeup remover cream or wipes specifically for that reason, but I rarely wear anything beyond lip gloss or lipstick.

-- Wash my face with First Aid Beauty face wash.

-- Use Body Shop Vitamin E eye cream a few times per week.

-- Apply Aveeno to the same areas as earlier every night.

-- Hair in a bun to sleep.

-- Once or twice per week use an exfoliating face scrub instead of face wash on face/neck/chest/back of hands.

 

HABITS I CULTIVATED OVER TIME:

-- Cut daily soda drinking (I admit I am struggling to entirely quit Coca Cola, but I definitely don't drink it daily or even every other day)

-- Minimize sugar and processed foods

-- Never consume sugar substitutes or aspartame and limit food dyes

-- 100% dairy free (due to an allergy but had a profound impact on my skin and weight)

-- Minimize alcohol consumption (less than one drink per week)

-- Read food labels -- if I can't pronounce most ingredients or sugar is in the top 5, I try to skip it

-- Cut way back on gluten products

.......Buy pasta imported from Italy that is more of an ivory color (there's a whole science behind it that I'm not great at explaining, but go HERE to learn more)

.......Buy gluten containing products that are as minimally processed, as possible

-- On occasions when I eat meat or eggs (I'm 80% vegan, most of the time, just naturally), I buy the highest quality, grass fed, free range, hormone free, etc. that I can afford.

 

Combined, these have made the biggest differences for my skin. But, as I said, it has taken time to see results. If I have a soda, too much sugar, too much gluten, not enough water, etc it shows in my skin about a day or two later and takes at least twice as long to repair the damage.

I started by focusing on just a few things at a time as my budget would allow, and it took a few years to really get to where I am today with my skin health. Taking time and focusing only on a few changes at a time for several months at a time gave me a lot of clues as to what does and doesn't work for my skin. I think taking time to see changes is one of the reasons people don't make the progress they want or expect and quit too soon when it comes to skincare, and really anything health or lifestyle related. It can be discouraging to go a week or two without any obvious changes. 

Lastly, I realize that I have a lot of privilege and that not everyone can follow these steps or make these changes. As I said, it's taken me time to get here, and there was a long period where I thought I would never be able to have habits like these. I have been poor enough to worry about being homeless. I've been poor enough to only be able to afford super cheap, super processed food. I've been poor enough to only be able to afford cheap soap and no face wash and no moisturizer. I know I'm fortunate to be in this position, but it took time and a lot of effort to get here. 

You can buy some of the products I noted above here:

*Some of these will be affiliate links -- thank you in advance for any purchases made through these links!

First Aid Beauty face wash

Aveeno lotion

The Body Shop Vitamin E line of products -- get 20% off your first order if you register with THIS link first!

......I particularly like THIS moisturizer and THIS eye cream.

Badger sunblock

Neutrogena SPF 55 sunblock

My favorite water bottle (It's a HydroFlask 24oz in the color "snapper" which is like a deep raspberry color.)

My favorite pasta -- De Cecco

 

What are your skincare tips? 

5 Things I love about masks that have nothing to do with Covid-19

Please note: links may be affiliate links in nature. If you purchase through them, I may earn a small commission -- thank you in advance!

 

Regardless of where you fall on the spectrum of mask wearing, there are some people for whom wearing a mask has multiple benefits that have nothing to do with Covid-19. I happen to be one of those people. 

 

I love wearing a mask for several non-Covid reasons and I hope doing so will become normalized even after Covid-19 is far in the past.

 

Here are five NON-Covid reasons why people might wear masks even after the pandemic is far behind us:

 

1. ALLERGY RELIEF:

As I write this, we are rapidly approaching my least favorite season of the year -- spring! I know, I know! Chances are you love spring and can't wait for summer, but I suffer from such serious and widespread pollen allergies that I can't stand the two seasons. I'm sniffling, itching, wheezing, and more from mid-March through mid-September. 

What does my hated of spring and summer have to do with masks? Well, one byproduct of mask wearing during the Covid-19 pandemic is my discovery that masks were MORE effective in dealing with my pollen allergies than most medications I've tried over the years!

2. ASTHMA 

As with my allergies, it turns out that wearing a mask has greatly improved my asthma! 

Cold weather, despite how much I love winter, is my primary asthma trigger. Wearing a mask means the air that enters my nose and mouth is already slightly warmed and thus I'm not prone to a coughing attack and possible asthma attack. 

Since the pandemic started, and since it has largely been considered to be over, I've had zero cold-weather induced asthma attacks! The difference? I wear a mask outdoors when it's cold.

3. CLEANING BARRIER

If dust, pet dander, or odors bother you while cleaning, wearing a mask is a great barrier! It will block a lot of dust and dander while you clean, but you can also dab a tiny bit of your favorite essential oil onto a mask to help cover unpleasant odors when you clean.

 

Side note: my favorite essential oil is a peppermint-eucalyptus blend from Thrive Market. You can shop Thrive HERE. If you are first time Thrive shopper, you may qualify for 40% off your first order! 

I have two dogs, one of which sheds a lot. Cleaning up her fur, especially after grooming, is made more pleasant by wearing a mask. Both are senior citizens and we live in an apartment. One of our dogs is old enough that she goes to the bathroom so frequently that it would be difficult to take her out to the park. As a result, we have a dog potty on our patio. It is not fun to clean up. Wearing a mask with a dab of essential oils has made the job much more tolerable.

 

4. FEWER COLDS

Much like my experiences with asthma and allergies, I've had far fewer colds when mask wearing -- even post-pandemic. I don't know about you, but I hate coughing, sneezing, and having to blow my nose all the time. I hate it enough that wearing a mask is worth it.

 

5. NO IDIOTS TELLING ME TO SMILE

If you are a woman reading this, you probably have men (and maybe even some women) telling you to smile randomly and without reason. They don't take the time to learn anything about you (and you probably don't want them to anyhow!) and they don't take a moment to consider that maybe you aren't smiling for a reason -- but also, do we really want to go around smiling 24/7? Sounds creepy and exhausting, right?

Wearing a mask has really cut down on the number of people that randomly, and without reason, tell me to smile. I happen to be an incredibly serious person, and I LIKE BEING SERIOUS. I find joy and fulfillment in my serious nature. When you tell me to smile, you disregard who I am as a person.

 

Wearing a mask resolves that for me. 

 

What are some non-Covid reasons that you might continue wearing a mask post-pandemic? Leave a comment and let me know.

 

P.S. -- Mom2MomEd is about to undergo a re-brand and re-focusing, including getting a new name. I'm a middle aged single mom to an adult child and living in the city. I love to travel, but also care about and am worried about the environment. I love drawing and crafting and selling on Etsy, and a bunch of other stuff. You'll be seeing a shift away from topics related to younger kids or generalized educational content and more towards single, middle aged mom life. I would love for you to stick around, but I also will understand if that type of content just isn't for you.

P.P.S. -- My drawing and illustration Etsy shop now has an associated YouTube channel! Right now, I am primarily filming ASMR drawing videos (visual content with ambient sounds, such as the sounds of my pen on the paper). Check it out HERE. If you read the video descriptions, you'll find a link to my shop (I'm waiting for YouTube to verify my account, so you may have to copy and paste the link) and a discount code for the shop!

P.P.P.S. -- The Mom2MomEd Etsy shop will be closing on March 31st and items from that shop will transfer to my drawing and illustration shop.

Three Ways to Manage Holiday (or any day) Stress

The holidays are fast approaching, and already I'm starting to feel holiday specific stress creep into my daily life.

How about you?

My to-do list is growing.
My budget is straining.
Old family tensions are, sadly, rearing their ugly heads.
Travel plans need to be finalized.
Gifts need to be bought.

I truly love winter and the associated holidays, but I also find this time of year to be trying and stressful. This year, I'm trying something new. I'm using three methods to help control my stress levels going into Thanksgiving and Christmas.

1. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate
Lately, I've been tired. Exhausted even. And, the more tired I feel, the more stressed out I get. It occurred to me recently that I'm not drinking enough water. I pound back coffee all day, but hardly ever reach for a glass of H2O.

Last week, I started making it a point to begin my day with a tall glass of plain water, to have another at midday, and yet another while I'm preparing dinner. I may not necessarily hit the daily recommended 6 to 8 glass per day, but I'm getting a lot more than I had been.

And, I'm feeling a big difference! When I'm hydrated, I have more energy. When I have more energy, I can get more done. And, when I can get more done, I'm a lot less stressed!

2. Stretch!
Along with not being well hydrated, I've also felt tight in my shoulders and joints. That tightness gets worse as I get stressed out which in turn increases my stress and then increases the tightness. It's a vicious cycle.

So, after I drink my big glass of morning water, I stretch. I just do a few simple moves--reaching to the floor, stretching overhead, flexing my feet and hands, and stretching and rolling my neck. It takes hardly any time at all, and it makes me feel so much better!

A good stretch at bedtime--or when I feel stressed or tired--also helps me to sleep better, and sleep is essential!

3. Manage my sleep habits
You can't function well without enough sleep and lack of sleep directly impacts your stress levels! When I'm tired, I'm cranky. I'm stressed. I'm frazzled. Everything seems so much harder! I've been working on my sleep habits for a long time, and a few specific bedtime habits are starting to stick and I've noticed the payoffs with better quality, deeper sleep. That, in turn, has led to more energy and a better attitude during the day.

The biggest game changers for my sleep habits include:

• Using an eye mask
• Using light blocking curtains
• Putting my phone across the room
• Using an air filtration system next to my bed

The eye mask and light blocking curtains have helped to create a cocoon like feel in my bedroom and allow me to limit bits of light that I might not be fully aware of but that keep me from sleeping deeply regardless.

And, we all know what a sleep-drain having your phone near the bed can be!

The air filter provides both cleaner air and a steady, noise canceling hum.

These habits are particularly important for managing my stress during the holidays, but they also are useful all year long.

What habits help you to manage your holiday stress levels? Any tips you've found to be tried and true? Or, what have you tried that has been an utter failure?

Here are some of the products I like best for improving my hydration, for stretching, and for getting a better night's sleep:

If you buy the air filter, you can get replacement filters on a subscription basis from Amazon! It's so easy to just set up the subscription schedule and forget about it. No need to remember to replace the filters or put it on your calendar since they are delivered directly to your door on a schedule you choose. Because I have three dogs and a cat, I change my filters every other month, but if you have no pets, you could replace yours far less frequently.

This post includes affiliate links. Purchases made through these links may result in a small commission to us at no extra cost to you.

Parenting through grief

I recently wrote about life being overwhelming and how I'm coping. Today, things seem more dire than ever. As I write this, I'm sitting next to an extremely ill family member and preparing myself for the worst.

I've already ugly cried twice in the last few hours and probably will have several more ugly cries before the day (weekend, week) is out. 

I'm trying to take things one day at a time...one hour at a time...

I'm trying.

But, I also have a son to think about. Even though my son is 18, he's still my baby. His brain is still developing, and all of his hormones are still all over the place. Overall, he's a normal 18 year old in most regards.

I feel so lucky to have the son I have. 

Like any other 18 year old, he's forgetful. He's more into his MMOG--massively multiplayer online game--than chores. He'd rather talk about The Walking Dead or Breaking Bad than school or a job. He's concerned that his hair parts in the right spot and how he looks in his jeans.

He loves Campbell's Chunky Soup, Doritos, and Hot Pockets, but he'll eat fruit and veggies if I put them in front of him.

He loves our dogs and where we live. He loves his family and his friends. He's smart.

He doesn't party or sneak around. Other than forgetting his chores, he's super responsible and dependable.

I have a good kid. He's a good egg.

But, we are struggling with grief.  I started going to a therapist a few months ago to deal with my multiple responsibilities and a health issue of my own, but now it's time for my son to talk to a therapist too. We're both close to facing some major changes in our lives due to our family member's health crisis, even if that family member pulls through and comes home.

Which brings me to the point of this post...how do you parent through grief?

My natural inclination is to hole up, alone, at home, and to block out everyone and everything, but I'm a mom. I can't ignore life.

For now, I'm parenting through grief in the following ways:

1. Counseling
There is absolutely no shame in seeing a therapist, a shrink, a counselor--sometimes the pressure of what life brings is just too much to bear alone. I needed a safe, judgment free place to talk about what I'm going through and to get unbiased input in how to deal with it all. Sometimes just talking it out is enough, but at other times my therapist has given me exercises to work on or specific tasks to take care of. Even if the sessions are sometimes really hard, they always help.

I've been to counseling before, and if you are considering going, please know that sometimes the first few sessions make you feel worse before you feel better--keep going! Also, if you don't like the first person you see, try someone else. You need to have a good fit with your therapist in order for counseling to be effective.

If you don't have insurance or think you can't afford counseling, ask about sliding scales, fee forgiveness, and payment plans. Years ago, when I was in an abusive relationship and had virtually no disposable income, I was able to pay a mere $5 per session thanks to a sliding scale. Some churches and organizations even provide counseling for free.

2. Medication
Just as there is no shame in seeing a therapist, there is also no shame in taking an antidepressant or anti-anxiety medication. I was on antidepressants for two years when my son was a toddler. I was overwhelmed with a bad relationship, trying to be a good mom, and trying to finish my undergraduate education. I stayed on those meds until right before I left our abuser. I would not have gotten through that period of life without the support of medication, a primary care doctor that was incredibly supportive, and a good therapist.

Today, I saw my current primary care provider, a nurse practitioner, and got a prescription for an antidepressant. My emotions and thought processes are all over the place due to stress related to ill family members and emergencies, work, parenting, my financial situation, and more. I needed help...I'm hoping the medication will help smooth out the edges and reduce the emotional roller coaster of emotions to gentle speed bumps. I don't want to be numb to life, but I want to be clear enough to handle everything.

3. Friends and family
I am thankful that I have a strong network of friends and family--many friends who are so close that they are like family--and so does my ill relative. I was able to ugly cry in the arms of one friend and she and her husband were extremely helpful in facilitating a meeting with a doctor and to articulate my relative's wishes clearly when I was at a loss for words. They also have been wonderful at intercepting contact between other friends and concerned acquaintances in order to give me some space to focus on the situation at hand. 

We are lucky in that our friends and extended family are willing to pitch in and help with my son too. A neighbor can take him to the grocery store and already often brings him soup and other homemade treats that he loves--even when we don't have a crisis happening! Friends, neighbors, and relatives fill in the gaps.

4. Ugly cry
I cried in the shower last night, and I pulled over my car and ugly cried in a parking lot. Getting out those overwhelming emotions while alone allowed me to pull myself together to focus and get through the hours ahead before the next wave of emotions. 

5. Exercise and nutrition
I have to admit that I've had two very large coffees today and I have a Coca Cola in my bag as I type this. It was tempting to stop at McDonalds or to guy buy junk food, but I made a better choice and bought a small package of almonds and filled my water bottle with actual water. In an hour or so, I plan to go to the hospital cafeteria and get some fruit, veggies, and protein. 

And, this evening, and again tomorrow morning, I will take my son and our dogs for a long walk. Exercise, even just walking, gets the positive endorphins going. I don't expect exercise or nutrition to make me perky and happy--all sunshine and rainbows--but it will help give my son and I a little boost. Walks together also give us time to get out of the house and outside of our own heads. And, occasionally, a walk opens up communication and we talk about deeper topics and what's going on in each of our hearts.

I anticipate a long road ahead for both my son and I. And, I anticipate that life will get worse before it gets better. Grief is a process though and even after all the unknowns around our family member's situation are resolved it could be a while before life goes back to normal.

If you are facing similar challenges, remember to be kind to yourself and focus on what you can control. Eat well, exercise even if only a short walk, and lean into your friends and support network. Go to counseling. Talk to your primary care doctor about what's going in your life. Consider medication--but only if you know you can take it safely and carefully.

And, if you are so overwhelmed that you are having dark or dangerous thoughts, get help immediately. Call your doctor's office. If you are thinking of hurting yourself or others, go to the Emergency Department for immediate help or call a suicide prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255. 

Take care of yourself so that you are able to take care of your family. Sometimes, it's ok to put yourself first. 

And, if you have any good tips on coping with grief while parenting, please leave a comment.

Adulting: Trying not to freak out over an abnormal medical exam

The past several months have been ROUGH!

R. O. U. G. H!

McKenzie and I have been working on Mom2MomEd as much as we can, but you may have noticed a significant drop off in our blogging lately...sooooo much has been happening for both of us!

I've mentioned a few times that my uncle is undergoing treatment for a brain tumor and that my mom's memory is declining. On top of both of those, I was admitted to the hospital for three days back in November for a partial bowel obstruction.

Well, my bowel obstruction seems to have reversed itself--the consulting surgeon thought it would and wanted to be conservative in his care--but I'm still having tons of pain and nausea every day. I've been seeing a great gastroenterologist, but medication and non-surgical options aren't helping at all. (I wrote briefly about it in THIS post about what a colonoscopy is REALLY like.)

And, because the health insurance I have right now is the best I've had in the last eight years, I figured I might as well get on top of things and get all of my annual routine exams taken care of, including my annual lady exams--a gyno exam and breast exam. My gynecologist is incredibly nice and put me at ease right away and, thankfully, my clinical breast exam and pap smear exam were totally normal and lab results for my cholesterol levels and thyroid function were excellent. And, even though guidelines vary and I could wait until I'm a bit older to have a mammogram, my gynecologist recommended that I get one now since I was adopted and don't know my biological family's medical history.

For the normal test results I've had so far, I've been thrilled! WooHoo! I'm doing GREAT other than this belly problem!

Those results felt like small victories given the health issues myself, my uncle, and my mom have been having!

But then...

My GI doctor suggested that I follow up with the surgeon I had seen when I was admitted several months back and that surgeon thought I should see someone a bit more specialized. All three doctors suggested that I have surgery--a right hemicolectomy, in other words, surgery to remove at least part of the colon.

I'm not thrilled about the prospect of this surgery, but I agreed to it because my symptoms aren't improving and there is a real risk of a major medical disaster in the future if I don't have the surgery.

So, I made an appointment to go back to the original surgeon to talk about scheduling the procedure and how to prepare. That same day, guess what? I got called by the mammogram clinic and told I had to come back.

My mammogram had an abnormality and I would need additional x-rays and an ultrasound.

Now, logically, I know that the likelihood that something is actually wrong is pretty low. There is a quite high chance that this is nothing and I'm totally fine.

But, honestly? How easy is it to be totally logical when you get news like that???

I'm freaking out a little bit inside.

I met with my surgeon later that day and told him about the abnormal result and that I was scheduled for follow-up imaging, and he reassured me that this is likely nothing and he is sure I'll get a clean bill of health.

Yet, I couldn't let it go.

I persisted and asked him if the additional tests showed that something IS wrong and I needed a biopsy or something, would he be able to do that in the same visit as for my surgery. He said yes.

My additional tests for the abnormal mammogram aren't for a few more days and I'm trying to remain calm.

At work today, I had some downtime and researched abnormal mammogram statistics and I'm a little bit--but only a little--reassured that it's actually fairly normal to be called back after a first mammogram. Why? Primarily because it's a first mammogram--there are no other images or exams to compare the x-rays to, so the radiologist must be meticulous in looking at the images for any sign of an abnormality. One article I read even compared breast tissue to being like a fingerprint--no two ladies have truly similar breasts, making the job that much harder for radiologists so they tend to be overly cautious.

I'm trying not to freak out.
I'm trying to remind myself that the odds are very much in my favor.
I'm trying to remember that even if something is actually abnormal, I have a great team of doctors and exceptional health insurance--many are not so lucky.

How do you handle news like this? Have you had an abnormal mammogram or other test in the past? How did you handle it and what happened?

Edited to add: It's been a while since I initially wrote this post and I've had both my abdominal surgery and my follow-up breast imaging. Sure enough, the abnormality in my breast exam was NOTHING! It was a small little cyst! Whew! I feel so much better having that confirmed!

And, my abdominal surgery seems to have been successful so far! I'm pretty much pain free other than a little tenderness around the surgical incisions and feeling tired if I try to do too much in a day. I'm bouncing back and am sure I'll be back to normal in no time!

Did you enjoy this post? If so, check out these other great articles:

While you're at it, we'd love to invite you to go shopping on Etsy:

REAL MOMS: Your first colonoscopy--what it's REALLY like

Friends, fair warning here--just like your gastrointestinal tract, this post is a wee bit long...

A few years ago, I would have been mortified and refused to admit that I...gulp...had a colonoscopy! I mean, I'm only 42! Surely too young for this right?

According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), the recommended age for a first colonoscopy is 50 years old.
 
I'm 42.

42.

4....2.....

But a couple of months ago, I had the worst stomach pain of my life and ended up not only in the Emergency Department, but admitted to the hospital and meeting a surgeon! It turns out that my colon is not fixed in place as it should be and was folded over on itself. 

I felt like I was being ripped in half.

Ultimately, I didn't have surgery and instead was sent off to the GI doctor after being released from the hospital.

And, a few weeks later I was getting 'scoped--a colonoscopy and an upper endoscopy (or EGD). The EGD part was super easy and I'd had that done before 15 years ago.

The only major prep for the UPPER portion of the exam? Don't eat anything for several hours prior to the exam. I could do that! Nothing to be worried about or embarrassed by, right? Easy-peasy!

The lower end....the colonoscopy...however, was something entirely different!

Really, go and ask several older people in your life about their colonoscopy experiences. How many say, "Oh, it was so easy and pleasant! Not a big deal at all!"? Probably NOT ONE will tell you that!

My uncle, a neighbor, older friends, and so on told me how much they hated their colonoscopies. Several told me that it was so unpleasant and embarrassing that they would *never* have another colonoscopy again.

NEVER.

I had always assumed that when people talked about how horrible their colonoscopies had been, that they were embarrassed by the procedure itself. I mean, seriously, the test involves putting a camera UP YOUR BUM and taking a look around.

Plus, you are lying there (asleep usually, but still...) on a table with your bare backside on view to anyone in the room while your doctor is a little too close for comfort in order for him (or her) to perform the exam.

Your BUTT is on full display.
Your BUTT is being probed.
Your BUTT is basically being violated by someone who is almost a stranger.

Oh...my...gosh!

I was dreading this exam, but it was the only way to be sure I didn't have any other issues or problems that could have caused my guts to fold up on themselves (McKenzie has nicknamed my problem "twisty guts"). When the procedures were scheduled, the scheduler handed me a prescription for "prep" and information detailing special dietary restrictions and so on that I would need to carry out in the few days before the procedures.

I already knew that part of the prep would involve a lot of, forgive me for being a little crude (but you knew I would be based on my BUTT talk, right?), pooping. A LOT OF POOPING.

You guys! After all of that prep and pooping, the colonoscopy itself was NO BIG DEAL! I wasn't at all embarrassed or worried about my butt flapping in the wind (wow...I hope I don't have a butt that flaps!).

Frankly, by the time I was sitting on a gurney in the procedures center and wearing a flimsy gown under a thin sheet and an oh so (not) chic hair cover, I wasn't thinking about my backside being on display or what my doctor was about to do to it.

I was just glad to be DONE POOPING!

The procedures themselves were easy compared to the prep! After I was all ready--gown, hair covering, sheet, IV and monitor--I was wheeled on my gurney into the procedure room itself where my doctor sat in the corner as two nurses were getting me situated.

I almost didn't care what was happening at this point because I was DONE POOPING and just so relieved to not be running to the toilet every five seconds.

A minute or two later, the nurses were injecting heavy duty sedatives into my IV and I was OUT. The next thing I knew, I was shaken awake by one of the nurses. Just a bit after that the doctor came in and told me that he thought everything looked really good (YAY!).

Moms (and dads or anyone else reading this...), the actual procedure of a colonoscopy is NO BIG DEAL (assuming you are sedated and OUT...).

The awful part is the preparation. It was sooooo much grosser and more embarrassing than anyone prepared me for! The doctor didn't really say much about the prep when I initially met with him, and the scheduler totally downplayed what I was about to experience. The pharmacist said nothing as she went over the prescription for the bowel prep solution with me. My parents, neighbor, uncle, and older friends said nothing about the prep.

The prep...OH. MY. GOD!

The prep involves a LOW fiber diet, followed by drinking an oral laxative solution, a clear liquids diet, a bowel prep solution, more clear liquids, and more bowel prep, and finally NOTHING for several hours prior to the procedure.

I wish someone had told me more about the prep! I knew it would involve a lot of time in the bathroom, but not quite the reality of the situation! I didn't think about how this prep might impact my sleep habits or my ability to do chores and errands and to just live life.

Whoa!

In order to have a clear view, your doctor really needs you to be *cleaned out*. You have to poop out EVERYTHING except for your brain.

The prep results in a lot of abdominal discomfort...cramping, bloating, and a lot of gas followed by a sudden need to RUN to the bathroom. This will continue off and on for HOURS.

The need will get even stronger and you'll be cramping up and pooping and passing gas to such a degree that you'll be afraid to fall asleep lest you have an accident in your sleep.

Forget leaving the house or doing your normal chores. STAY HOME!
Forget meeting friends for some pre-procedure camaraderie. STAY CLOSE TO THE BATHROOM!
Forget going on a hike or even walking your dogs. CANCEL APPOINTMENTS!

Make sure you have PLENTY of toilet paper or consider investing in flushable wipes...but be careful that you don't clog your toilet! Poop some...wipe a little...flush. Repeat. Don't poop a ton, wipe a ton, flush...you'll simply overload your toilet's ability to do its job efficiently. Thankfully, I realized the potential for a toilet pooptastrophy right away and took measures to avoid a toilet bowel overflow!

For the two days ahead of my procedures, I really couldn't focus on a whole lot except how far I was from the bathroom.

Now that the whole thing is a month behind me (haha!), it feels less traumatic, but I still never want to go through that prep again!

But....I will.

Colonoscopy is an incredibly powerful tool in screening for colon cancer, and colon cancer kills. While you likely won't need a screening before the age of 50, unless you fit into certain categories or have risk factors for colon cancer, it's something you should be ready for, no matter how awful the prep is or how embarrassing you might find the exam. 

It turned out that my insides are pretty gosh darn healthy other than that bizarre twisting I experienced (the twist has since resolved, but I'm still having a lot of pain and nausea).

Am I looking forward to a repeat experience? Nope. 
Will I go ahead and do it, despite the horrors of the preparation? Yep!

The year is 365 days long (except leap years...), and the prep only impacts two to three of those days and usually only every 10 years or so.

And you can do the prep in the privacy of your own home.
And you don't need a colonoscopy annually--every 5 to 10 years will do, depending on your risk factors and medical history.

I can deal with that.

And, I've been promised that pretty much every colonoscopy is just like your first.

I wish I'd known more about the realities of colonoscopy prep ahead of time, and I hope you found this post helpful if you are facing your first colonoscopy! Of course, we all have our own, unique experiences, and what I found objectionable about all of this might be different from your own experience. Regardless, if you are facing a colonoscopy, EGD, or any other procedures, I hope your final result is a clean bill of health!

What other embarrassing situations, issues, or concerns do you have questions about but are too afraid to ask? Let us know and we'll do our best to answer! We're real moms and want to help other real moms just like us!

Please note--nothing in this post is meant to be medical advice.

This post is merely an expression of my own personal experience.

If you think you need a colonoscopy or have health issues that need to be addressed,

please consult your doctor or healthcare professional!

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